I have been trying to finish my first draft of my first novel for some time now and every time I draw near to it, I get stuck on the ending and find myself involved in a big rewrite before I find myself at the same point all over again. This is where I was last Monday morning and here I was again today. I don’t know if it’s a sort of ending procrastination, meaning that I am putting off writing the ending. More likely, I think, is a feeling of being completely overwhelmed by the enormity of this task I have taken on of writing a book but I really do want to get to the end, honest. I just want it to be a good ending as well! During the time I have been writing this novel since April, I have come to realise that there is so much more involved than I first thought despite all the advice out there, no-one else can do it for you. In the end, it’s just you and your computer 🙁
So, I am now more than 80,000 words into my debut novel, as you may know. But, I am stuck on the ending. After much reflection, I have realised that this is because I haven’t got the plot right. I am therefore going to take a reader’s advice and read my own novel to enable me to write down all the main events and perhaps, move things around a bit. I hope this will allow me to make it work and to decide on how to finish the story.
I am off on holiday on Thursday and I have printed out my novel (160 pages!!!! Two to a page though to save on paper ;)) to read and edit whilst I’m away. Please God, this will give me some clarity.
I have been feeling really miserable this week, thinking that my writing’s never going to be good enough to publish to the world but I have realised that I need to take pride in having written so much already and in only six months! I now feel ready to read and edit so that when I return, I should be raring to go.
Have a good couple of weeks everyone 🙂
P.S. I bought Scrivener with my 50% off code as a Camp NaNoWriMo winner and having used the trial version a while back, I hope this is going to help me organise my novel much more easily. Any hints and tips from other users would be much appreciated.